My Blog!!

Hey family and friends! So I decided to make a blog just to make everything convenient for you guys and for me. I know if I was you guys I would want to know whats going on of course but not wanna bug me.. and for me I want everyone to know whats going on, but it gets tiring telling 8 billion ( i have a lot of friends) people a day. So i figure this was good for both of us! You can see whats up, and I don't have to tell as many stories. I dont want this to be a 'feel bad for me' blog, so it will be filled with lots of stuff that might be inappropriate humor at times to make me/you laugh, but if you know me then you would have already known that was coming.

I figure I should keep everyone posted from the beginning so here's whats been going on:

-about a month ago I had pains in my stomach and went to student health. She told me I had heartburn. She was only a little off considering it was cancer. Maybe I should be a doctor when I grow up

-Last Saturday I came home and had my first catscan! MEOW! It was an interesting experience. I got to wake up at 5 am and drink make-your-organs-glow shake. Then when i was there he injected into my arm something or other and told me it would feel warm all over. He also warned me it might feel like i was peeing. I should have taken him more seriously becuase when i thought I was peeing my pants I was clenching for all I was worth thinking, 'dont pee dont pee dont pee!'

-Monday was a bit of a scary day, my parents came to school and picked me up after they heard the knews that i had abnormal growths going on, but I didn't know yet. So they got to come and see mine and Alex's apartment after we hid all illegal drugs, alcohol, boys/strippers, porn, and our pet shark. Alex and I somehow managed to get in a fist fight, but we later decided she was just 'punching the cancer out of me'

-Tuesday I had a meeting at the cancer center. This was all really weird and scary. The word cancer at 19 is just pretty... weird. He explained that they think I have cancer, but we have to get a biopsy done to get it checked out. This day was also important because I got on a bit of a closer relationship with my doctor. Warning: slightly innapropriate story ahead..
*So I was lying on the table for him to do a little exam of me and my hand was gripping the side of the table instead of on top, not sure why. So when he leaned in to start doing his exam i realized my hand was in not such a good place. But I couldn't pull my hand back b/c that would have been akward, b/c I didn't think he realized what was going on, and I didn't want to injure anything. So as he was getting close and checking out my situation I was just thinking in my head.. you know what.. this isn't even bad. Becuase he's got me.. I got him. It's fair. I was also thinking.. man.. why do WEIRD things happen to me?? Don't worry, he's not a creep he didn't know my hand was there I dont think, just fyi. But that's how I decided we already are started on a close relationship.

I wanted to get away for a night, so I went and drove to Purdue to see Taylor. I made a nice trip to Wendy's and pigged out on the dollar menu. I figured hey.. i had a hard day.

-Thursday morning had my biopsy. YUCK! sidenote: if you dont like needles, avoid the biopsy. I was awake but heavily sedated fortunately. Also- for people like my roomie Hillary if you're thinking about being a nurse, think about appropriate times to ask questions. When we were in the room with my parents and the nurse was prepping me she asked if I was pregnant or any possibilty I might be. I was just thinking, well THAT would be good timing to let mom and dad know. The biopsy took not too long, and I was in lala land, but we had to stay a few hours at the hospital afterwards to make sure I was good as.. new..kinda. Then i got to come home and veg on the couch all day (not complaining)

-We were hoping for results on Friday becuase we had a meeting with Dr. Dragon. It was a long day just waiting to hear exactly what it was and it was dissapointing to hear that they still didn't know. What we were told on friday was it was for sure that I have cancer, but they're not sure what kind. They said they would be sending it out for more testing, and I would have to wait longer to find out.

-That weekend was a good weekend considering what was going on. Tay came home, and Ness and Carly surprised me and came home too :) I was super thankful, because it really took a lot off my mind to be able to hang out with them for a few days. It's so comforting knowing what amazing support I have, not just from them but from everyone. On that note- I found out that a priest said a mass for me in mountains north of Thailand. Talk about connections!!

-It's now Monday and we were hoping to hear some news, but they said they still don't know. So far we know that its not lymphoma, and its most likely something very rare. The wait is pretty agonizing but I'm hoping to find out early this week what is going on. They said theres a possiblity they might admit me to University of Chicago Hopsital for more procedures to be done to figure out what this is. As much as I dont want to do that, I'm ready to find out what this is, so I can start kicking its ass.

So that's where we are as of now. Probably not much information that you didn't know already, but hopefully it gives you an idea of where I'm at. I know I made lots of jokes and it seemed funny, but don't think im not taking this seriously. I just didn't want to make a page of depressing information in a sort of whiny sort of way, it's just not really my thing. After this will probably not be such silly stories, but as of now I'm keeping my positive attitude and theres NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT! I will try to keep this updated with info. when I know exactly what they're diagnosing me with. Until then, thanks for all the support I've gotten already, it really means a lot!